"Wanna see Ironman2?"
"Sure, 7PM?"
"Yes. Pick you up at 6:30?"
"Okay!"
I would buy the tickets on the Arclight app. He would pick me up at 6:30. We'd head over to Sherman Oaks, watch the movie, then go to dinner at one of the near-by restaurants and talk about what we liked and didn't like. This became so habitual that our texts devolved into:
"I2 @7"
"K"
I cannot tell you the last film I saw. GHOSTBUSTERS? STAR TREK BEYOND? Both were fine. Both were vaguely memorable or at the very least not completely forgettable. Is this the bar, now?
This morning, I was reading The Hollywood Reporter's article, "Summer Box Office Wrap: Why Hollywood's on Red Alert Despite Near-Record Revenue." The piece posits that despite North America box office receipts of $4.5 billion (buh-billion), audiences are down by 3%. Only - only - 518 million people went to the movies this summer. Considering the American population is currently 321,418,820, that means everyone in the US, Canada and Mexico went to the movies once. (Right? I mean, that's the only way to get that number, isn't it?) However, we did not all go see ALICE 2. We might have all saw FINDING DORY. When these kinds of numbers -- millions and billions -- are thrown out, it's difficult to see the much larger picture: The intersection between entertainment and consumerism. In fact, we might need Hubble to understand it.
The digital disruption that hit the music industry in the 90s, hit Hollywood in the early-00s. The name of the entertainment game is Money, but in order to make the Money, you need to be selling something people enthusiastically want. When tastes change, things can go drastically wrong especially when a business plan is forecasted a decade in advance. Remember the Bruce Springsteen song "57 Channels (and Nothing On)?" I'm pretty sure ESPN has 57 channels dedicated just to itself. If cable cannibalized broadcast then the streamers were the school yard bullies who took cable's lunch. I tend to think of content now in terms of the economy: Feature film is the 1% and anything we can watch on our smartphones is the 99%, and that gap is getting bigger by the day.
The THR article states that audiences are not showing up at the theaters because we are suffering from sequelitis. Which is true to a certain extent. The fatigue I feel hearing about yet another MCU announcement is akin to the feeling I used to get on the first day of school. I knew I had to go, at times I even wanted to go, but it felt like a never ending obligation that would end someday but not soon enough. Worse, when an original movie like SECRET LIFE OF PETS kills in one weekend, by Monday a sequel is announced. Just because we had a good first date, Illumination, doesn't mean I want a promise ring. I've got commitment issues I need to work out before then. The sheer number of sequels makes it easier to opt out, too. Once you miss THOR 2 and there was no nuclear fall out, THOR 3 seems unnecessary. The stories are tangential but not integral to each other or even, sometimes, to the action currently on screen. I can sleep through half of CIVIL WAR (which I still think is an Avengers movie regardless that I'm told time and again that it's CAPTAIN AMERICA 3) and still know the storyline. Because it's not about the story. It's about very attractive people running around and fake fighting to save the alt-universe with no real impact on anything. Not each other, not the other stories, not the audience. Certain feature films feel like I'm watching my friend play a video game: At the end of it, I have had chemicals stimulated in my brain so I feel like I've had an experience, but I really haven't. Every Cap movie wants to up the stakes from the film before, but it ends up not making it's thematic point. CA1: Genesis story in which there is a clear evil villain, Hydra, and everyone pulls together to defeat Hugo Weaving. CA 2: Cap is not the only Super Soldier. Best friend Bucky is, too. But Bucky has been brain washed. Oh no! Must save others from Bucky. Must save Bucky from himself! CA 3: Must save Bucky again! By saving Bucky, Cap saves himself! But Bucky has done a lot of bad. Like, a lot. Philosophical questioning of how much one life matters: Save Bucky despite Bucky's murder of millions of people. Where do we stand on the death penalty for convicted murderers with mental issues? If you could go back in time and abort Hitler, would you? But we must save Bucky because he is the last vestige between Cap and the world he knew! Vote Trump! Make Captain America Great Again!
It's not sequelitis for me. It's the lack of compelling stories. It's not newness that I need as much as I would prefer not to spend $16 on movie ticket with an additional $10 on concessions and $3 on parking for an experience I can get sitting on a couch watching someone play Halo. I think Disney and Kevin Feige are doing a great job. Just look over at DC/Warner Bros to see how wrong it could go. I just feel like we're losing in feature film what we're getting from cable and streamers, thoughtful storytelling. And maybe, to the detriment of features, I'm being trained by good episodic TV to expect my sequels to have story continuity between installments. Is that fair to two different mediums? These lines are beginning to blur. What is the difference between 57 episodes and 57 sequels?
I've been told that I absolutely must see FLORENCE FOSTER JERKINS because it's fun. And I'd like to see SOUTHSIDE WITH YOU because I'm desperate for a romance these days. Like THR article mentioned, it's these smaller movies that are "surprising" the studio decision makers because they are making money. Not buh-billions. But mmm-millions. While I decide which of these two little indies I'm going to invest my twenty dah-dollars in, I leave you with the Boss and his quaint little problem of the early 90s.
